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It's Been Nice, 2013

(Counterclock-wise from top left) Britton in her Cinderella outfit at 4 months, our first baby shower, the nursery, pregnant Natalie at 28 weeks, 2 month old Britton, the new family at Britton's baptism, Landon in his onesie, opening presents at our second shower

This year has been crazy--some crazy good and some crazy bad.

Over the weekend, Landon and I were talking about how we were excited to start 2014 because of all of the fun things we've got lined up in the coming months.

Our Annual Christmas Progressive Dinner: What It Is, Why We Have it, and How to Host Your Own

Our Annual Christmas Progressive Dinner: What it Is, Why We Have it, and How to Host Your Own | CosmosMariners.com

Two years ago, when my sister and I had both moved out of our parents' house (at 24 and 26, respectively--no shame) and into our own homes, we decided to start a new Christmas tradition: the Christmas Progressive Dinner.

While, at first glance, seem to be a dinner where we all get together and discuss the direction of politics, culture, and technology, the reality is far less sophisticated (at least in our case: you totally make your dinner your own!). We use it as an excuse to get together during a very busy time of the year and stuff our faces.

Christmas Randoms

This year was Britton's first Christmas. We tried to make it as exciting as we could--visiting Santa, getting our tree, buying lots of fun gifts for everyone--but at the end of the day, she was most excited about the wrapping paper.

And speaking of wrapping paper, twinklepoop is totally a thing (as I had the joy of evidencing yesterday). Don't say I didn't warn you.

While I'll dive into more of our holiday antics next week (after I've had a chance to breathe), I wanted to share a few things with you before we head out for Christmas round 2 at Landon's parents' house.

My family did our third annual Progressive Christmas Dinners, which is basically an excuse to eat amazing meals back-to-back over the course of four days. Just one Christmas dinner? You are way behind, my friend. (This event is so awesome that it warrants an entire post next week.)

Britton was awesome during the Christmas service. She refused to take a nap all day Christmas Eve, and by the time the 3 p.m. service started, she was rubbing her eyes and bucking like a bronco. Maybe it was the music, or maybe it was a Christmas miracle, but she danced and played the entire service without a peep.

"Gosh, mom, you're embarassing me."
We exchanged presents at my parents' house Christmas Eve, and had the final dinner in our Progressive Christmas Dinner series.

Britton: "The Day of Wrapping Paper has finally arrived! My life is complete!"
Two seconds later: Britton decides that she's done opening presents, and she's off to eat something that she shouldn't.
Can you tell that Britton is the daughter of a former college Literature professor (and the niece of a die-hard Mr. Darcy lover)? She got so many cute classics-themed gifts that I'll have to do another post on them!
We stayed overnight so that we'd all be able to see our Santa presents that arrived Christmas morning.
Britton investigates her loot from Santa. And yes, I'm totally rocking footed onesie pajamas.
Britton LOVED the monorail that I got to go under our tree next year. Giant baby takes over Disney World!

After playing with our presents from Santa, we packed up in the car and headed out to my grandmother's house, which is about two and a half hours away. I really didn't want to go back this year because the house reminds me so much of my grandfather, who passed away just before Thanksgiving. But my grandma really wanted to go back for one more holiday (she now lives with my parents here in town), so we did it to make her happy--and hopefully help start the closure process.

With my dad and Britton at my grandma's house.
Grandma opening a present from my cousins.
I don't know what we'll be doing next year, but it will involve staying home on Christmas day, which will be the first time I've ever done that in my entire life. We lived all over during my childhood, so we always traveled to my grandparents' house each year. My tradition for Britton is centered around one thing: not traveling. We've got another 11 months to figure out the rest of the details.

I read Marisha Pessl's Night Film (which I loved) and saw The Wolf of Wall Street (which I thought was awful). I'll definitely be doing a review of the Pessl book because it is so awesome and I just want to talk about it all the time with everyone, but I might do a review of Wolf, too, just because it was like a car wreck, and sometimes you've just got to talk out your feelings after you experience something terrible.

So, there's our holiday in a nutshell. We're off tonight to see the other side of the family.

We're embarking on a four hour trip with a 6 month old who hates being in her carseat. Pray for our sanity.

Happy Holidays, all!

A Baby's Guide to Christmas

Merry Christmas Eve Eve, everyone!

Stationery Nerd Alert: How to Use a Wax Seal Kit to Personalize Your Letters

I'm slowly working on our Christmas cards (about half are stamped, addressed and ready to go), and they should be completed by tomorrow. While I love all things stationery and mail, I do have a bit of the procrastination gene in me, which accounts for the fact that still haven't send out my Christmas cards..and we're down to six days.

Anyway, since it's not like I'm rushed for time or anything (ha), I decided to do a little something extra for my holiday correspondence this year: a wax seal kit.

I've used a sealing wax and stamps on and off for years as a way to jazz up a letter or card. It's really easy to do, and the end result looks awesome. (See, I DO have more interests than just traveling!)

6 Children's Books Worth Revisiting

Our little townhouse has very little storage, so when we're preparing for a project, the stuff that gets displaced usually ends up in our upstairs hallway.

Currently, we're trying to get a built-in bookcase going, but with the passing of my grandfather, Thanksgiving, and Christmas happening in such rapid succession, we realistically won't get the project underway until early 2014.

In the meantime, all of the books that should be on the new shelves are in bins that are lining our upstairs hallway. This arrangement is super annoying since the hallway is now half the size it should be.

However, there is a silver lining: I get to revisit books that have either been packed away for years or stuffed on a shelf. Landon keeps finding me reading these children's books from years ago. He laughs at me, an almost-thirty-year-old pouring over a thin little children's book.

What can I say? There's some great stuff in children and YA fiction! You only have to look at the popularity of Harry Potter, The Hunger Games, and Twilight to see that I'm not the only one dipping my hand in the little kid literature cookie jar.

Here are eight of my favorite kids' books that are worth a revisit. And for what it's worth, they are all at least fifteen years ago, so you might find something other than the dystopian future/ vampire/ werewolf novels that are so popular these days.

- Alien Secrets, Annette Curtis Klause. Puck, who's every inch as mischeveous as her A Midsummer Night's Dream namesake, has been thrown out of her Earth boarding school and must return to her parents who are working on the planet Aurora. On the spaceflight to join them, Puck befriends Hush, an alien who is also going to Aurora in shame. He has lost his race's beloved treasure. As Puck helps Hush figure out what happened to the treasure, they are both drawn into the mysteries occuring aboard the starcraft.

I first read this book when I was in late elementary school; I was not a fan of science fiction (though I did love a Michael Crichton novel at the time). I think the fact that I loved this book in spite of the alien stuff going on speaks to the univeral appeal of Alien Secrets. Klause writes in a compelling manner that will draw elementary and middle school readers in (though, I must confess, I just re-read this, and was still captivated). Plus, all of the futuristic stuff never got dated, and, as a reader, I can still very much believe in the world she created.

Recommended for: late elementary or early middle school readers.

-The Herculeah Jones series, Betsy Byers. While The Black Tower is my personal favorite, there are several mysteries starring the unflappable Herculeah Jones and her friend Meat (what awesome character names, right?!). These books are aimed at the late elementary crowd, and are a bit scarier than most of the Encyclopedia Brown-type whodunit books that are usually penned for that age group. Byers does a wonderful job painting the spooky situations that Herculeah and her frizzy hair find themselves in. You might be familiar with Byers' "The Summer of the Swans," which won the Newberry Award in 1971; the Herculeah Jones series is completely different in tone and theme. Basically, if Sue Grafton wrote for the playground set, this series would be the result.

Shameless plug: I had the opportunity to have dinner with Betsy Byers when I was in college (she's a friend of my uncle's), and she was just as awesome as you would expect--friendly, hilarious, and witty. She and her husband live in the upstate of South Carolina and fly little planes from the airstrip behind their house. Definitely an author worth investigating, if you haven't already.

Recommended for: mid- to late-elementary school readers.

-Woman in the Wall, Patrice Kindl. When I found this book, I was in the sixth grade, which is an awkward time at best and a painful time at worst. This book spoke to me in so many ways and made me feel as if I weren't the only one in the world who felt weird, out of place, and odd.

In this book, Anna decides to withdraw from her family and society completely when she's seven; she builds a little fortress within the walls of her own house. As the years pass by, her family forgets that she even exists and she lives this protected but lonely life watching her family through the walls. However, someone has remembered that she's there, and her struggle to decide to leave is heartwrenching. Because of this book, I wanted to go to a costume party wearing a butterfly outfit with gorgeous green wings, and show everyone that I was different than the shy, quiet girl that sat in class with them all day.

Recommended for: middle- and high-school readers.

-Girl in the Box, Ouida Sebestyen. The best word to describe this book is "haunting." Even years later after reading it, I still find myself mulling this book over.

Jackie McGee is kidnapped and thrown into a concrete cell. It's dark, save for a tiny sliver of light coming from under the only door. She had her typewriter and a ream of paper in her backpack, so she decides to record her thoughts by touch typing. Sebestyan creates a scenario that is so real that you find yourself praying for a happy ending to Jackie's story.

While there are elements to Girl in the Box that are dated (the typewriter, no cell phone), this book transcends the technology within it. Few books--for children or adults--have captured the seemingly random terror and hopelessness that Jackie is forced to face in this book. In a world where Twilight copies are a dime a dozen, a book that focuses on a strong, capable young girl who deals bravely within a terrible situation remains refreshing.

Recommended for: high school readers.

-Melusine, Lynne Reid Banks. This book has all the hallmarks of a standard YA book: a moody young narrator, annoying family members, a love interest, and a bit of mystery thrown in for some excitement. However, there are deeper, darker themes within this book that separate it from the crowd and make it worth reading and discussing along with your child.

Roger is on holiday in France with his family; they choose to stay in the guest cottage of a crumbling old chateau run by a brusque man and his daughter, Melusine. As Roger gets to know Melusine, he realizes that her life at the chateau is cloying and isolated. He wants to help her, but she's evasive. He uncovers her deepest secrets, which shock him to his core, and in his quest to help her exercise her demons, he quickly realizes that he is far over his head.

Unlike Banks' other books (she's best known for the Indian in the Cupboard series), this book doesn't end tidily. I could see it being a great summer reading book, or as a way to talk about the importance of honesty, communication, and awareness with your child. Plus, your child will learn about the French myth behind the title character.

Recommended for: high school readers.

-The Dinotopia series, James Gurney. In the first and second grade, I was obsessed with dinosaurs. My mom had bought me Isaac Asminov's Did Comets Kill the Dinosaurs? when I was in the first grade, and before you could say "T. Rex," I was plowing through everything I could find about them (I even convinced my parents to let me read Jurassic Park, which was awesome and terrifying all at the same time!). When I was in the fourth grade, I found the Dinotopia series and fell in love all over again.

The series focuses on the journals of Arthur Denison and his son who are shipwrecked onto Dinotopia, a forgotten island where dinosaurs still exist--and where they co-exist with the human inhabitants (all of whom are descended from shipwreck survivors). The pair travels throughout the land, learning about this world and seeing how they could fit into it since there is no escape from the island.

If the story line doesn't reel you in, the pictures will. Gurney includes spectacular watercolors throughout the series as a way to bring the world to life.

Recommended for: elementary and middle school readers.

Have you read any of these books? What were some of your favorite books from back in the day?

Christmas in Savannah, Georgia

Landon and I decided not to give each other presents this year. We already have a lot of stuff, and  most of the things that we really wanted to give one another (a new master bathroom, a new house) weren't really feasible for holiday gifts.

One thing that was wanted was time together. And that is definitely possible, though a little difficult with all of the Christmas stuff this time of year.

Since we were taking Britton with us, Landon and I chose somewhere that wasn't too far away for our mini-escape. We didn't want to torture our poor baby (or ourselves) with a really long car ride because she's recently decided that she hates her car seat and will gladly scream until we let her out.

We live in the Charleston area, and there aren't too many places that you can get to in two hours that are worthy of a mid-winter break. From here, we could go to Myrtle Beach, Columbia, Florence, Hilton Head, or Savannah.

Landon and I both have a soft spot for Savannah (so much so that I named our blog after a Savannah-based author), and we've visited many times. The city has a ton of stores to walk around in and great restaurants to eat at, which was just perfect for us--we wanted a low key weekend away.

We didn't make any plans. We didn't book any tours. We just found a great deal on Priceline the day before we left, packed a few things, and piled in the car. It was completely stress-free (which is saying a lot these days, as anyone who's ever traveled with a six month old knows that being between a 6.5 and an 8 on the stress scale is pretty much a given).

We stayed across the Savannah River from downtown over on Hutchinson Island. I'd never been to the Westin resort, but I'm always up to try a new hotel. I was excited when our Priceline bid was accepted and we found out that the Westin would be our home for the weekend. Plus (and this was a BIG draw for me), we got to take the water taxi across the river to go shopping and to eat. I know--I'm a huge dork. It's the little things in life that amuse me to no end.

Britton wasn't too bad on the car ride down there: she sleep half the way and screamed half the way. After we checked in, we wandered around the hotel to look at all the decorations.

Bundled up in her Baby K'tan to check out the hotel Christmas lights!
River Street and the Savannah skyline from our hotel
After exploring the hotel, we headed back upstairs to our room. Britton was acting tired, rubbing her eyes and yawning, so Landon and I thought "yes! she's going to go to bed early, so we can all get some rest!" Britton's always been a good sleeper, but in the last week or so, she'd been fussy when we put her down to rest and she'd been waking up multiple times each night. I figured it was a combination of the vaccines she'd gotten last week, teething, and her six-month-growth spurt. Whatever the cause, we were all tired.

So much for wishing.

With a full tummy and in her warm pajamas, Britton fell asleep in my arms as I rocked her, but as soon as I put her in her crib, she woke up and started screaming. Landon took over, rocked her back to sleep, and tried to put her down. Screaming ensued. This cycle continued for two hours until she finally went to sleep after midnight.

Needless to say, our relaxing retreat didn't start out exactly as we expected.

However, being the eternal optimists that we are, we figured that Britton would sleep in Saturday morning since she'd gone to bed late.

Let's all laugh together.

At the stroke of 6 a.m., she was back up and at 'em. She was so grumpy, but refused to go back to sleep. Landon, being the saint of a husband that he is, offered to walk her around the resort for a bit so I could rest. Ahhh.

I woke up again an hour later to a beautiful morning in Savannah. I was a little sleepy, but nothing could dampen my mood for our full day of shopping and sightseeing.

The view from our room. Hello, Savannah!
We hopped on the free water taxi that ferries visitors across the river. It makes three stops: at the Westin, at the Waving Girl statue, and near the Hyatt Regency on River Street. If you're visiting, make use of the public transportation to get around. There's also a free trolley that goes up and down River Street, as well as one that hits up major points in the historic district. Walking is definitely the best way to see the city, but sometimes, you've just got to rest those feet for a minute!

We can at least look perky, even if we don't feel that way! 

Our shopping was interrupted by a downpour. The rain cover on Britton's stroller just wouldn't withstand the rain, so Landon put her in the Infantino carrier and zipped her up in his Columbia rain jacket!
After darting through the rain, we headed over to eat at the Pirates' House Restaurant. I know it's a tourist spot, but I love eating there. Plus, where else can you eat in a 300 year old house where a guy dressed up like Jack Sparrow will give you a history lesson?
Next was lunch at the Pirates' House restaurant. I love their Fried Green Tomato BLT (BLFGT?) salad.
Walking around burned up some calories, so we stopped by Sweet Carolina Cupcakes to get a few treats. Landon was afraid that the icing would get smashed if we just held them, so we put Britton in my carrier and strapped the cupcakes in the stroller. People pretty much thought we were crazy!

That night, we were tired from walking around, so we took the water taxi back over to the hotel. We were sort of hungry (but still kind of full from our lunch and snacks), so we ordered a hamburger from room service. I'm totally country-come-to-town, but I've never ordered room service before. The guy who brought it even set it up in our room.
Plus, there were mini condiments. Life is good.
Britton got up TWICE Saturday night (between 11 p.m. and 6 a.m.), so we still weren't feeling too great Sunday morning. Still, we wanted to make the most of our last hours in Savannah. We packed up the room, and then headed out to the nearby Fort Pulaski for an early morning history lesson.

What's the best way to keep your baby warm when you encounter a chilly breeze? By stuffing her inside of your jacket, of course.

The front of Fort Pulaski. It was designed by the same man who was behind Fort Sumter (in the Charleston harbor) and Fort Jefferson (in the Dry Tortugas, off the coast of the Florida Keys).
A few more pictures from inside the fort:

Even with Britton's bizarre sleeping patterns, we still had a wonderful time. Landon and I decided that we're going to try and do a weekend getaway every year instead of exchanging gifts--any ideas on where we should head next year?

Have you ever gone on a trip instead of exchanging gifts?

We're in the Holiday Mood...Sort of

Normally, I'm all about Christmas.

I love buying presents and watching as my recipients open them.

I love getting presents (I'm not modest!).

I love seeing the twinkly lights that are hung all over town.

I don't love listening to the same old Christmas songs every year, but it's part of the process, so I embrace it. (The N*Sync Christmas album is the exception. That CD--which I bought from an actual record store in 1998--is pure listening gold.)

Last year, I pretty much tried to skip Christmas. I had an excuse, though. I was halfway through my pregnancy, and still dealing with relentless morning sickness. Who wants to deck the halls and stuff your face when you're constantly feeling like you might puke in the tinsel? We got a tree and we Landon decorated it. Baby Tadpole (we didn't even know it was Britton yet!) got lots and lots of fun things--things that we're using this Christmas, which I think is super cool. Christmas 2012 trundled along even though I couldn't give it my all, and I ended up having a pretty good holiday.

This year, I'm struggling again. Not because I'm sick like last year, or because I've decided I hate Christmas. I can't put my finger on the reason why, but it still doesn't feel like Christmas yet, even though we've started checking off the Christmas to-do list, like going to see Santa. And because of my lack of holiday mood, our house looked like it does the other eleven months in the year until last night.

I wanted to skip getting a tree this year (the horror! the horror!) because Britton is trying her dardest to crawl, the dog flies around here with abandon (usually skidding into furniture because our hardwood floors offer no traction), and the addition of baby stuff has made our tiny, 1100 sq. ft. house completely cramped.

Why bother? I thought. It will just get torn up by Britton/ the dog/ a combo of both. It will take too much time to decorate and put up, and heaven knows I have plenty of other things I need to be doing (like blogging, obvs).

But Landon, that wonderful husband of mine, insisted that we get a tree because it would make the house happier and Christmas-ier.

He was totally right. But don't tell him that I said that.

After Landon got off work last night, we went off into the chilly (for South Carolina) night to find our tree. Britton had just gotten up from her nap--which went late into the afternoon because Britton wasn't feeling well from her 6 month immunizations she'd gotten earlier--and was in a pretty good mood considering that I'd made her get three shots only hours before.

Landon and I broke from tradition and got a Douglas fir this year instead of a Fraser. Neither of us has ever had anything other than a Fraser, but the Douglas firs on the lot were so much fuller and greener. They smell a little different than the Fraser firs, but that's why I've got my awesome Fraser fir candle to burn, right?

Britton approves! She grumpily evaluated all of the other trees, but smiled when we got to this one. Coincidence? I think not.
Clockwise from upper left: 1) Britton's standards of tree purchasing are extremely strict. 2) The tree made it home and through half of the light stringing. 3) The tree in the sunlight. 4) Our tinseled mantle + our crocheted stockings.
Clearly, we didn't get too deeply into the decorating. We made it through the lights and the tinsel before Britton needed to go to bed; she was up half the night with a little temperature because of her vaccinations, so I've been limping along this morning. We might get some more decorations on the tree tonight--or we might not.

At least Britton's first Christmas won't be a total bust!

Britton Visits Santa (+ My Thoughts on St. Nick)

About a month ago, someone asked me when Britton was going to visit Santa, and the question caught me completely off guard.

I don't know if it's because I haven't gone to see Santa in about twenty years or because I was seriously sleep deprived at the time, but I had not given one second's thought about a picture with Santa.

I asked my husband, my sister, and my mom about a potential visit, and all of them looked at me as if I were crazy. Of course Britton needs to see Santa, they all told me.

I still wasn't convinced. After all, she's only six months old and guaranteed to remember exactly nothing of this Christmas. Plus, I am deeply conflicted about Jolly Old St. Nick (but more on that later).

Then, the Mommy Guilt started to set in. Britton's going to be the only baby who doesn't go see Santa. Britton will look at me in ten years and say, "Mom, what was wrong with you? Why aren't there any baby pictures with Santa?!" Also, I was going to completely ruin Christmas this year, and since it was the first Christmas that Britton would experience, there was basically a slippery slope from skipping Santa to skipping the whole she-bang in a few more years.

So, off to Santa we went. Landon and I were unsure as to how Britton would react. Most of the time, she'll go to anyone. She does this so well that, half the time, I'm pretty sure that she would assist in her own kidnapping because she's just so friendly to everyone. But then there's that 2% of the time when she decides that I am the best thing since sliced bread, and if I give her to someone else, she gets completely and totally grumpy.

Add this to the fact that she refused to take a nap yesterday afternoon, and we had a perfect storm of baby grumpiness brewing.

Or so I thought.

She ended up being a little angel. Britton checked out Santa, looked at the camera, and even smiled a tiny smile. Piece of cake!

I'm always worried about the creepy factor of handing my child to a perfect stranger dressed in a red wool suit, but this Santa was really nice and very patient as Britton figured out where to look for her picture. All in all, we couldn't have had a better experience. Plus, I highly recommend going on a school night because there wasn't a line at all.

Britton and Santa:

While the picture is impossibly cute (and I admit to sneaking peeks every few minutes!), I'm still not totally sure about the whole Santa thing in general.

As a kid, I didn't dwell too much on the idea of Santa. I went to Catholic school, as well as Methodist (and later Episcopal) Sunday School, so the religious aspect of Christmas was never far from my mind. Somehow, Santa had something to do with baby Jesus, but I didn't worry about it--I was one of those little kids that accepted things as they were. I wasn't the curious one asking where babies came from, or how Santa visited all of those kids in one night, or how in the world a bunny can carry baskets of candy. If my parents said it was so, I believed that it was.

It wasn't until late elementary school that I deduced that something was off about Santa, and I got a little creeped out by the idea that a diabetic, bearded man that I didn't know was roaming around our house while I slept.

While I know that many parents point to the Santa tradition as something fun and creative, I can't get away from the idea that I'm 1) lying to my child, and 2) getting away from the actual reason for the Christmas season. I'm all about making this fun for Britton--and heaven knows that I was a creative, highstrung child--but looking back, I'm not sure what a belief in Santa did for me growing up.

I don't like lying about anything. Most people in my life would tell you that I'm too honest. So why would I spin a yarn to Britton about Santa? I'd rather her know that it is her parents, aunts, uncles, and grandparents who love her and want to gift her new things. Plus, how can I tell her not to lie when I'll basically be doing the same thing under the guise of holiday fun?

The important part of Christmas to me is the time that I get to spend with my family: going to the church service Christmas Eve, making our Christmas Eve supper, opening the presents we've all worked so hard to purchase and wrap, and watching a holiday movie or two. The season isn't about getting stuff from a man in a red suit.

I'm still not sure what I'm going to do about this in the years to come. It seems cruel to ignore Santa completely, but I'm not one of those people who think that Santa MUST be this huge part of our holiday celebration. I think I'd be more comfortable with Britton learning about the actual Saint Nicholas and the myths that have been a result of his actions.

What are your thoughts on all of this? How did you think about Santa when you were a little kid? How have you approached the Santa component of Christmas, especially if you're Christian?

Freelancing: What It Is and How to Do It

If you're like me (a stay at home mom), you're probably looking for a way to bring in a little extra money: that's where freelance writing can come in.

Before Landon and I had Britton, we worked hard to make sure that we could live off of one income. Not only did this tactic allow us to put more money towards responsible things like buying our first house and paying down our school debt, it created the opportunity for us to travel to Scotland and have a baby.

When we had decided that the time was right to start a family, we agreed that whoever was making the lesser salary would stay home with the baby. As it turned out, our salaries at the time of getting pregnant weren't that far apart, so we decided that I would stay home with Britton because I had the flexibility to work from home through freelance writing.

As luck would have it, I had started freelancing just after I found out I was pregnant. I loved writing, so the idea of getting paid for publishing my work was a great fit for me. Plus, I could do it in my spare time away from my full-time job (which, at the time, was teaching English at a homeschool program). After some research, I found several places that would kick start my freelancing career. Freelancing is kind of like getting a book published: no one wants to take you on unless you've been published, but you can't initially get published unless someone hires you. While I won't ever buy a private island with my freelancing income, the jobs I've taken on have given Landon and I some extra fun money that we wouldn't have otherwise had with me staying at home with Britton.

So, here are my tips and tricks on freelance writing and editing:

  • You have to LOVE to read and write. I don't say this lightly. Clients sometimes ask me to research and write a 500 word article in just a few hours. While 500 words isn't that much (most of my blog posts are probably longer), creating and researching an article of that length while also watching a six-month-old isn't the easiest. Someone who only kind of likes writing, editing, and researching should consider a different work-at-home position.
  • You have to be able to adapt quickly to whatever comes your way. With freelancing, clients are paying for both quality and quantity. They don't want an article filled with poor writing, factual mistakes, and grammar errors. They want a well-written, cleanly-edited piece that their readers will be able to easily follow. I've written articles on everything from Disney World (which I know a TON about) to faucets and energy-efficient plumbing (which I knew NOTHING about before writing the articles): if I don't know about a product or company, I need to find reliable resources that will allow me to write about them as if I'm an expert. 
  • You have to look for the jobs--and the competition can be vicious. A freelancing job hasn't ever fallen in my lap. At minimum, I've had to send in writing samples, references, and links to past jobs. My most intensive application process was about a month long and required me to produce multiple new sample pieces and demonstrate that I could do basic HTML coding. There are a ton of people who are qualified to be a freelance writer and editor, so you have to be on top of your game constantly. Double check your work. And then check it one more time. If you don't, you will lose jobs because of poor editing.  
  • Start with the people you know. If you're looking to get into freelance work, collect your best blog posts together and post them on Facebook, Google+, or Pinterest. Let your family and friends know that you're open for business; you never know who might be willing to give you a shot. My first freelancing job was for a high school friend who had recently opened his own marketing company. He wanted to focus on the business side of things without having to worry about the quality of the writing on the client blogs and websites. Just remember to have your expected minimum wage, completion timeline, and job requirements in your head from the very start, or you could lose the client due to being unprepared.  
  • How you get paid varies. Some clients want to pay me per word; other will pay me per paragraph. Some will want me to bid on a project--these are the scariest since you don't know what the other writers are bidding. As a freelance writer, you get to set your own rates most of the time; ask around to see what other freelancers are getting. Don't sell yourself short! Also, open a PayPal account if you don't already have one. This is a safe, easy way of getting paid, and most clients are very comfortable completing a transaction through PayPal.
Places to start if you're just getting into freelance work:
  • About.com. I worked for them as a wedding invitations topic writer before they restructured their website (they phased out the topic writers in favor of the guide positions, which require a much larger commitment). They are owned by the same company that owns the New York Times, so they are an extremely reputable company. The application process for these positions are insane, so be prepared to pull out all the stops. If you get one of this positions, you have arrived as a freelance writer, as an About.com position is considered the gold standard of freelancing. They pay per article and you are guaranteed a paycheck each month for completing your minimum. If you are extremely knowledgeable about a topic, check out their open listings: there are available positions in everything from jewelry to DIY home repair to powerboating.
  • Craigslist. As with anything on Craigslist, approach with a healthy dose of caution. However, if you can weed through the scams, there are often some great writing and editing jobs to be found here (both local and remote). Just remember: never accept personal checks or send out your financial info without knowing the person. Any legit company will work with you to make you feel comfortable in all aspects of the writing process. 
While there are a million other places to find freelance positions on the internet, I'd start with these if you're new to the game. 

Happy writing!

Six Months Later...and the Surprises Keep on Coming!

Six months ago tonight, I was doing far worse than I currently am (though, I must say, not much beats blogging in your pjs while watching a movie with your significant other): I didn't have the easiest labor (for the gritty details, read the series I wrote here, here, here, and here), and Britton had some issues post-delivery.

I never imagined that my tiny baby who needed tubes to breathe and an IV to regulate her blood sugar would turn into this robust, outgoing, happy little girl that is currently sleeping in her crib.

Even though the pediatrician told us from our first post-NICU appointment onward that Britton would have no lasting issues from her dramatic first day, I had trouble believing him. Why is it that parents always imagine the worst?

The last six months have been amazing: Britton smiled at me for the first time, she learned to roll over (both ways now!), she can sit up, and she loves playing with Landon and I. Nothing makes my heart smile like peeking into Britton crib and seeing her beam back at me.

However, the last six months have been crazy difficult, too.

At one point, I was so tired that I couldn't fall asleep.

I would cry at the thought of having to wake up one.more.time without feeling rested.

I struggled with Britton nursing--she had tongue-tie, she had been bottle-fed in the NICU, she was (frankly) a lazy nurser who preferred the bottle. I finally started to pump exclusively, which took hours and hours of my time, kept me from going all sorts of places (who wants to haul around a stupid pump!?), and stopped me from snuggling with Britton as much as I wanted to (when you're stuck to a pump for 3+ hours a day, your baby has to learn how to keep herself occupied).

But, this week goes to show that being a parent is an ever evolving process. As Britton's six month birthday approached, I had decided that--for my sanity--I had decided to quit pumping and switch to formula. I was sick of pumping. I was sick of being away from my baby for hours each day. I was tired of having to haul that awful pump everywhere.

For kicks and giggles, I figured I'd give nursing one more go and end on a note of "well, I tried." I had come to terms with everything emotional that comes along with decided to wean before my baby wanted to.

Lo and behold: Britton latched yesterday morning. And all day yesterday. And all day today.

Six months into bottle feeding and pumping, my child has decided to nurse. I'm in uncharted waters here, as every site I search about beginning to breastfeed focuses on newborns and recently postpartum moms. Even websites that offer up advice for pumping mamas who are transitioning to breastfeeding usually focus on pretty small babies.

So, that goes to show you that babies can surprise you--even after you thought that they were (really) set in their ways. I have no idea how long this chapter of our lives will last, but I'm willing to take my cues from Britton since she obviously knows more than I do.

Happy six months, Britton!

Gaining and Losing

Gain and loss.

No, this isn't a blog post on how to lose weight quickly (or at all--I'm definitely not the one to ask about weight loss right now since I can't seem to keep my fingers out of the cabinets for more than fifteen minutes). 

This is a blog post on life and death and everything in between. 

2013 has been emotional. I gave birth to my amazing daughter, a time that was both wonderful and terrifying, and I said good-bye to beloved grandfather. 

As a first-time mom, I got to experience the highs and lows that come along with being pregnant, going through labor and delivery, and coming home with a beautiful but puzzling little human. 

On the other end of the spectrum, my mom's dad passed away just a few short weeks ago. He's the third grandparent I'd lost, but, since I was with him when he died, his death has impacted me in such a different way than the others. 

You might wonder what I'm doing--what does the birth of a baby have to do with the loss of a grandparent? To me, everything. 

I hadn't ever experienced the dawning of a new life until Britton arrived. And I hadn't watched the setting of someone else's until Grand-dan passed away. 

But having been there for both (and in such a short time period), it seems as if they are so much more connected than people want to admit. 

When Britton was born, I kept asking Landon, "Where did she come from?" He thought that it was the medication talking (and, to some extent, it probably was), but what I was trying to grasp was this idea of being, of place, of existence. We've all got our individual ideas on what happens after death (reincarnation, Heaven, nothing, etc.), but no one really seems to dwell on where we come from. 

In those heavily medicated days, I also would cry and cry because I probably won't be there for every day of Britton's life. I would think of her as an old, old woman, and know that I would not be with her. The idea that we'd be separated tore me apart in those emotional first days. It saddens me now that she and I will one day have to say goodbye to one another just as I did to my grandfather. 

When my grandfather went into the hospital, we all thought that he would be okay. He'd been having some issues with his heart, so we were completely shocked to find out that he had stage 3 cancer. After he found out about his diagnosis, he seemed to accept it--and at that moment, his health began to decline drastically. I went up to be with my mom, grandmother, and grandfather; I stayed in the hospital room with my mom and Grand-dan for moral support and company. 

Those 48 hours that I was there opened my eyes as to what happens at the other end of life. I learned that there are signs that death is impending, like the way a patient is breathing or the color of the patient's legs. I learned that helping someone through the final transition is mentally and emotionally challenging for everyone involved. Grand-dan told me multiple times, "I want to beat this, but I know I can't." He wanted us to know that he was okay with dying, and that was the hardest thing for me to accept. 

I had to tell him, "Grand-dan, I love you. It's okay to go."

Just as I had to help bring Britton into this life from wherever we come, I had to help lead Grand-dan out of it. Neither was easy. There were tears shed, memories made, hands held, doctors talking, hugs exchanged, and lives changed in both.

In some ways, I feel as if I peeked behind the curtain of life and, for a brief moment, saw a tiny bit of what makes this world tick. But I have no conclusions, no big reveals about the meaning of life still. Birth and death remain mysteries to me. And they should. 

What I do know is that I love both of them and will treasure the time I do have. If I look at it that way, there are only things to gain, and nothing truly to lose. 

Favorite Things: The First 6 Months

Baby Physics Law #1: The smaller they are, the more stuff they need.

Britton has been showered with love in all forms since the day we found out that we were expecting. Since she's been here, we've gotten to test drive so many things. Some have worked out better than others, and some have been absolutely indispensable.

Here are the wonderful items that have made our lives with a baby a little easier in Britton's first six months of life:
Since I don't have a picture of us, you get treated to a stock photo from BabyKtan.com.
Baby K'tan. I love scarves, headbands, earrings, and necklaces--if you can find an accessory, chances are I will love it. It's no small wonder then that I was drawn to the woven wraps and carriers that are so popular for babies these days. After researching the available baby carriers, I decided that dealing with the super long fabric of a Moby-type wrap was more than I could handle, and that the Ergobaby was comfortable but a little more than I wanted to spend. In my research, I found the perfect solution for Britton and I: the Baby K'tan. It comes in a bunch of colors (which appealed to my accessory-loving self), and it was made of soft fabric. It was easier to put on and use than a traditional style wrap, but I knew it would still be comfy for baby Britton. And instead of the $100+ that the ErgoBaby commands, the K'tan was about $45.

I practiced on a baby doll before Britton arrived so I would be familiar with the types of holds: there are many, many helpful videos on the Baby K'tan website and YouTube to guide you through the multiple ways to wrap the K'tan.

Britton LOVES the K'tan, and we use it regularly when we're out on shopping trips. I sometimes wear it around the house when I'm doing my freelance writing work or chores. When she was super tiny, I would put her in the kangaroo carry and she'd fall right asleep while I worked. Now, she loves the inward facing and outward facing carries, and will gladly stay in either for quite some time while I'm working or shopping.

All strapped into her car seat and stroller and ready to go for a walk!
The Graco LiteRide Stroller in Zooland. At first, I didn't want a stroller (all of you experienced moms can go ahead and get a good laugh out). I figured that the Baby K'tan was versatile enough that I wouldn't use a stroller. Luckily, my mom insisted on buying the Graco stroller to go with the matching car seat we already had. I love being able to snap Britton in the car seat, and then quickly click her into the stroller when we get to the mall or the grocery store without taking her out of the seat. It's especially helpful when she's sleeping, and taking her out to put in the K'tan would wake her up. Plus, the stroller's really easy to break down and put in the trunk, which is awesome for a complete weakling like me. We also have a running stroller (which we also love) but that one is so much heavier and not really great for quick trips in and out of the store.

"Just five more minutes, Mama!"
Luv 2 Zoo Bouncer. This is Britton's new favorite thing. She could spend HOURS in it. One time, she actually fell asleep in it--I noticed that she was being very quiet all of a sudden, and when I turned around, she had her cheek propped up on the edge of the seat. She bounced herself to sleep!

There are three different stations on the bouncer, and the seat rotates 360 degrees so she can access any of the toys when she wants. At 5 months old, she was about 24" tall, and she could juuust touch the floor with her toes. To make it easier for her to bounce, we put a little box under her feet. Now, at almost 6 months old, she doesn't need the box. The bouncer has three different levels so it can continue to grow with her.

Nom, nom, noms.
Nuby transition bottles. We started off with the Medela bottles that went with the manual pump I got because I (erroneously) thought we'd only occasionally need to bottle feed Britton. Her voracious appetite led her to discover how to drain those in just a few minutes--she already has issues with spitting up all the time, and the gulping of her milk wasn't helping. We tried pausing during her feedings so that she was forced to take a breath, and that helped space the feedings a little. When she was about four months old, however, she had enough coordination to try and hold the bottle during feedings; Landon and I quickly found that fighting Britton for control of the bottle on top of attempting to pace feedings was too much. If Britton wants to help feed herself, then we'll help her make that happen. We got the Nuby transition bottles, and she immediately took to them. I love that they can be used as a regular bottle, a handled bottle or a handled sippy cup, which will really make the transition out of a bottle easy.

Other honorable mentions:

  • The First Year's Infant to Toddler Tub with Sling. It's safe, it fits in the sink, and it has a removable baby sling. Plus, it's lightweight, sturdy and inexpensive. What else could we want in a baby tub?
  • Mesh Crib Liner. When she was a baby, Britton constantly would wiggle in a corner and get her foot stuck in the slats since we didn't put up a traditional bumper. This would wake her (and us) up, and in an effort to ensure that we all got more rest, Landon and I went on the hunt for a breathable bumper. This one worked beautifully; Britton no longer gets her feet stuck, and I can sleep easier knowing that this type of bumper doesn't increase the risk of SIDS.
  • Infantino Vented Carrier. This is Landon's carrier of choice. The K'tan (my carrier) comes in sizes, and there's no way that Landon was fitting his shoulders in my size small carrier. He had to decide between getting a second K'tan or getting a harness type carrier (the Moby style wraps weren't even a consideration in his book). He found this carrier on Amazon and really liked it; he actually uses it, and Britton likes riding in it, too. It's great for keeping her close while doing chores, and Landon likes to wear it when he and Britton are on their own while shopping. It's adjustable, which means I can wear it too!
  • Baby Trend Jogging Stroller. We've only gotten to use this a few times since Britton has only recently gotten complete head control (which is necessary for riding in any stroller without an infant carrier attachment). Landon is the runner of our family, and he says that the stroller works like a charm when he, Britton, and our dog Phoebe are out on jogs. I've taken it on a couple of walks, and the stroller is extremely easy to push; I also like the two cup holders. It's a bit bulky for quick runs to the grocery stores, nor is it compatible with the Graco car seat we have, and that's why I've used the Graco (above) more. 
Experienced moms: what were your favorite items in the first six months? What should we look to get for the second six months?

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Britton's Giggle Fit

Sometimes parenting is hard. Really hard. I won't lie and say that everyday with Britton has been a breeze--there have been some days that I have wondered what I was thinking when I decided to try and raise another human being.

I have definitely not enjoyed every minute since June 5 (despite the advice of every little old lady I meet in the grocery store); running on three hours of sleep a day, listening to Britton cry and cry because she's too tired to go to stay up but too stubborn to go to sleep, and figuring out how to balance my working/ writing schedule, Britton's sleep/ eating/ playing schedule, and my pumping schedule have driven me to tears on more than one occasion.

But then something will happen and I understand why people say that parenting is the best job ever. I thought I would explode with happiness the first time Britton smiled at me.

Recently, she's started doing something even more awesome: laughing. Landon caught her on his camera on night as the two of them were playing with an old stuffed Minnie Mouse of mine. I'd never heard her belly laugh like that before! It happened the night before I went up to stay with my grandfather in the hospital as he was dying, and watching that video got me through many, many tough moments over the next week and a half.

So, take a look at little Miss Britton:

I Wish...

...that I could find a sweater/ legging combo that worked. I'm tall enough that most tunics just look like slightly baggy shirts on me, and thus, would be ridiculous looking with leggings. Still, I find these pictures on Pinterest of these perfectly coiffed women who look so cozy in long sweater tunics, thick leggings, and riding boots, and pine away.

Britton, why you do dis to meeeeee?
...that Britton would figure out that 5 a.m. is a time for sleeping, not breakfast. It's much, MUCH better than 3 a.m., but there's something about that pre-dawn hour that makes me so weary. It's too early to think normally, but it's too late to really go back to bed (because Landon's alarm will go off and wake me up about 3 minutes after I get back in bed). Could I order a 6 a.m. wake-up tomorrow, little one? Pretty please?

...that I didn't have to wait until next year to go to Disney World. We're planning on taking Britton when she's 18 months old because 1) that's an awesome age for kids and Mickey Mouse, and 2) it will be right around Christmas, which is my favorite time to go. That just seems so long! (As a side note, I must say that I wouldn't dream of going right now because I'd have to haul all of Britton's baby stuff, including my pump...and let's face it, nothing sucks the magic out of Disney World like having to haul a stupid breastpump around with you.)

...that the house would magically stay clean. I've never been OCD about my house, and, before we had Britton, I was good about keeping it slightly messy but clean. Now, I spaz whenever I find Landon's flip-flops under the coffee table for the nineteeth time in a row. I'm sure it's because I'm at the house all the time now and so any mess bothers me more. Unfortunately, my hatred of messiness did not come with an overwhelming desire to clean more. Total catch-22.
Yup, nailed it.
...that the weather would stay gorgeous forever. It's currently 78 here in South Carolina, and I'm in shorts. I hate being cold, so this warm front is very welcome. Stay away, winter!
My idea of the perfect holiday
Happy weekend, everyone!


In my last post, I talked briefly about control and how my attitude towards it has changed since having Britton. Since that post, I lost my grandfather (who I was extremely close to) and that experience has made me examine my control issue even further.

From day one with Britton nothing turned out the way I planned. I wanted an all-natural birth with no medical interventions. I used my Hypnobabies home program, and my husband and I listened to the tracks religiously. But then, at 39 weeks, we found out that 1) I had tested positive for GBS and had to be administered an IV during labor (there goes the no intervention), and 2) Britton was measuring so far ahead that she needed to be induced. There was much talk of her head being too developed to be delivered naturally, but I decided to hedge my bets and be induced. That entire process ended with me in the operating room fourteen hours later delivering a baby in respiratory distress via C-section.

One day old, and covered in tubes and wires.
Then, I decided that I wanted to stick to my guns and breastfeed, the other important part of my labor/ delivery/ postpartum plan. The NICU that Britton stayed in for three days wasn't breastfeeding-friendly and only wanted to give her formula. Then, after taking her home, nursing her was hideously painful, so we continued to give her a bottle when I was in too much pain to try and nurse. About a week and a half after Britton was born, a lactation consultant finally diagnosed her with a severe tongue-tie, which we corrected with a quick procedure. Her nursing habits, however, were more difficult to change; she didn't know how to latch properly, and I was tired of trying and failing, and ending with pain and crying. So, I started to exclusively pump and feed her out of a bottle.
By pumping, I could get everyone, including my parents, to help out during meal time!
As Britton grew, I found it exceedingly difficult to let go of the notion that I got to go to bed when Landon did. 10 p.m. would roll around, and I would tearfully watch Landon get ready for bed; after all, he had to go to work the next day, bright and early. Before Britton figured out night from day, I was up at all hours--but none were as difficult as the early morning ones. I'm actually kind of a night owl, so being up late wasn't the thing that got me. It was the lack of control I had to tell this tiny baby, "Okay, it's night time. Go to sleep like Mommy and Daddy do." She was dictating the schedule at that point, and I had to learn to go with it.
If I keep my sunglasses on all the time, you won't be able to see the half-shut eyes and dark circles--right?
When my grandfather was sick and in the hospital, I was lucky enough to be there with him in the days leading up to his death. He knew that he was dying--and was glad that it was the pneumonia that would take him and not his newly-diagnosed cancer--and he was okay with it. He told me, "I want to beat this, but I know I'm not going to." That was the hardest thing for me to accept. I was completely helpless in this situation. I could do nothing to help my grandfather except tell him that it was okay to go. But how do you let go of someone who you love?

Christmas 2012. I'm in the front row (four months pregnant!) with my grandmother and grandfather. Landon's standing behind me in the purple shirt.
In the last five months, I have shed many, many tears over all of these situations--some are obviously more important, but all have worked on me in their own ways. Looking back, I know that I have learned to release some of that control. Deciding to exclusively pump was emotionally heartbreaking, but I have a little schedule for pumping now and I know I'm still giving Britton the nutrients she needs. Landon and I have regulated Britton's sleeping schedule, so it's more consistent now. She'll even sleep through the night most of the time. Being with Grand-dan when he passed showed me how much of our lives are trust that someone else will continue to bear the burden when we are too tired to go at it alone.

For all those new moms and dads out there, you can't control everything. And that's okay. Control over every situation is not the important thing in life. Love, in all of its forms, is.

Britton's Birth Story, Part IV

I have never been as grateful for family as I was in the hours and days after we had to rush Britton to MUSC for those tests. While Landon rode in the pediatric ambulance with our little girl, my mom and Landon's dad rushed downtown to the hospital to meet the two of them there.

Since I wasn't even 48 hours out of surgery, the nursing staff begged me to stay where I was; I could barely walk and was still incredibly weak, so I chose to remain in the hospital with my dad, my sister, and Landon's mom by my side.

As soon as Britton arrived at the research hospital, the staff there began to run tests on her to determine what was causing her to vomit so violently; they also needed to figure out a way to keep her heart rate and blood oxygen saturation stable. She was x-rayed, and the attending physician determined that Britton had an infection in her lungs, possibly pneumonia. She was given antibiotics for that, but, since the pediatric radiologist wouldn't be able to see her until the early morning, we still didn't know if she had an intestinal blockage.

That night was the longest night of my life. I couldn't sleep, even with all of the pain medication I was taking. I could only sit and stare at the ceiling and worry about my two-day-old baby who was going through something I couldn't help her with. The worst part was that I was so far away from her and completely helpless myself. I was told that I would be discharged as soon as I could get up and walk around, so my sister and I walked the halls as much as I could in my weak state. I was determined to see my baby the next day.

Saturday morning finally dawned, and the pediatric radiologist at Britton's hospital administered the tests to see if she had a bowel obstruction. Two tense hours later, Landon called with the news that Britton's tests had come back negative! The doctors had determined that the infection in her lungs and her abnormal vomiting were two symptoms from the same root cause: her aspiration of meconium during her delivery. While that wasn't great news, it gave us a course of action to take--one that didn't involve surgery (thank goodness).

When the day shift nurse at my hospital came on, she assured me that I would be placed at the top of the list for discharge. By 1 p.m. that afternoon, I'd made the horrendous journey into the heart of downtown Charleston. It wasn't horrendous because of the distance (it was only 7 or 8 miles), but because of all of the potholes and uneven roads, which were not kind to my brand new abdominal scar.

I was so excited to see Britton and Landon again. Britton looked really great, even after being poked and prodded for all two-and-a-half days of her existence. Landon had been up all night with her, holding her and keeping her company.

Even though Britton made my heart happy, I hated being up in the NICU at that hospital--there were so many very sick babies, some of whom had been there for months. There was one baby across from Britton who had been permanently sedated to keep him out of pain; he'd been in the NICU for six months and was still extremely delicate. Seeing them made me that much more grateful for my almost-healthy baby; I only wish all of those babies could have the quick diagnosis and recovery that Britton did.

Even though she was doing much better when I got up there on Saturday afternoon, she wasn't out of the woods yet. Britton's doctors wanted to make sure that her lung infection cleared without any more complications and that she was able to eat without additional vomiting.

I got extremely frustrated with the nursing staff because I wanted to breastfeed her (the one part of my birth plan that I had clung to since I'd had to make so many other changes in my labor and delivery); even though they claimed to be friendly to breastfeeding moms, they didn't want me to pick her up very much (so how can I breastfeed?!?) nor did they want to give her the tiny bits of milk that I was producing at the time (but what else can one expect--usually milk doesn't come in until the fourth day or so). I ended up pumping as much as I could, but it still wasn't enough for them. Landon and I argued and argued with them about not giving her formula (our original plan), but they told us that if we let them supplement what I was pumping with formula, they could then see if she would really eat, and she could go home soon. That Saturday, I stuck to my guns and told them that I only wanted her to have breastmilk.

When I went back up to the NICU Sunday morning (after getting up every two hours to pump), I was exhausted and ready to bring my baby home. Landon, who'd had all of about nine hours of sleep since Thursday night, was edgy and annoyed. The nursing staff had all but thrown him out of the NICU around three that morning when they couldn't get Britton's IV in. They still weren't feeding her what I had worked so hard to pump, and Britton was solely on a dextrose drip to keep her blood sugar stable. Their rationale: if we give her just the little bit of milk that you're producing and we don't supplement, then she'll still be hungry and will get upset. Maybe so, but if Britton had been home like a regular newborn, she'd only be eating what I was producing anyway.

I saw Britton for about twenty minutes that morning before I had to step away and collect myself. I just couldn't stand looking at her IV that they'd stuck in her leg or the black and blue marks on her little hands where the nurses hadn't been able to get the IV back in. The charge nurse found me in the family waiting room around the corner, bawling my eyes out. She and I had a frank talk about Britton's treatment, and we tried to come up with some answers to make everyone happy.

The nurse told me that Britton was really a Level II baby, but MUSC's Level II nursery didn't have any open beds. They couldn't move her to Level I because she hadn't eaten yet and, thus, still needed an IV. Our insurance wouldn't cover a transfer back to the Level II at our original hospital, so we were stuck in a situation where we had the healthy, recovering baby in a room full of extremely sick babies. In an effort to get Britton closer to being released, Landon and I agreed to allow the nurses to feed her what I had pumped and then (and only then) give her formula to supplement. It wasn't ideal, but I wanted my baby home.

I went back to my parents' house that night at 7 p.m., exhausted from a long day at the hospital and sore from moving around so much. I had just stretched out to take a little nap when my mom brought the phone into my room: it was Landon. "Can you come back down here?" he asked, and my heart stopped--I immediately assumed the worst. But then: "The night staff is going to discharge Britton as soon as you can get up here."

What a surprise! I jumped up and threw clothes on. I was going to bring my little girl home! I didn't even care that I had to bump along those terrible roads in downtown Charleston again: the pain and exhaustion would be worth it.

By the time my parents and I arrived at MUSC, Landon had dressed Britton in her going home outfit. He and I went through a quick discharge meeting with one of the nurses, and then the nurse helped carry her to the car. Four days after her birthday, Britton finally came home!